personal documentation, for myself more than you

fuck.fuck.fuck.

just get out!
GET OUT!!!!

The past two weeks I've been trying to distract myself. Its been working, but still when I go to sleep and wake up, the thoughts come.

Its always been a choice for you. It never was for me.

So this year, I'm going to do exactly what I've stopped myself from doing out of truth. I'm going to fall in love. I'm going to fuck.I'm going to sleep. I'm going to let someone else sleep in my bed with me. I'm going to let gooooo...

I don't want to see it anymore. I don't want to see any of it.from the very first day to now.

"There's no telling how long I'll be here. At least I can't see them."
Love, pialé