so. im smoking.

i know. i know. ive said that ive quit for a long time but i never honestly have intentions of quitting. like many things in my life, i say im going to stop. but i know always, deep down inside that im going to go back to IT.
And plus, djarums remind me of so many people, so many places. Many memories have been made inhaling djarums.

so. a lot has gone on.(And my computer keeps crashing and my phone is somewhat broken, so I have no way of documenting) but its all more internal. well. some.
first off.
moving:
it weird. its so great.and so bad at the same time.
i feel lonely. yes. i have june. but i dont know. i still feel very lonely.it might be the packing unpacking thing. I did feel like this last year when I moved up north. but that was also for other reasons.but then again, they really are the same. They've just progressed. While unpacking I found a shitload of journals from high school and last year. My thoughts have advanced but the feelings are the same.I'm still stuck in the same place as 9th grade. Yes, I've accomplished the short term things. But it all comes down to one thing. Love. I measure myself by love.
Fuck.it hurt reading through those journals.After all those years, you were the only one who stayed in those journals.

But the place is beautiful. Our bedroom is terribly cozy.
My side looks very modern 60's. I didn't plan for that. It just kind of happened.
We have a giant wall in the living room that is being filled with beautiful pictures and paintings and objects. The bathroom is going to have a nature-ish theme to it.lots of twigs and branches. On our chimney is pieces of chalk so people can write on our chimney bricks.poetry.words.drawings. questions.confessions.
Our kitchen is pure vegetarian and is fully stocked with various amounts of tea. We have a green tea kettle, courtesy of my mother. There really is so much more, but its something you have to see in person! Which by the way, we are having a house warming party. We're casting a circle before and blessing the house and then party!
Number 1 rule is:
there will be no sort of throwing up all over my bathroom. (This mainly applies to andrea.)
We're thinking the 30th? I think its a friday. Invitations will be sent out. And gifts are welcome. :)

I'm taking this magic,witchcraft and religion class. Bad ass class. He likes to call out the wiccans, him being one himself.and such interesting looking people in that class.I've fallen in love with this black wiccan guy.well. FOND BUT NOT IN LOVE.

All in all, I am enjoying what I have right now. I just wish I could share it.